{"formatVersion":"1.1","id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy","path":"/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy","title":"Making the Most of Couples Therapy","family":"Library detail","description":"Get the most out of couples therapy by attending with an open mind and minimal expectations.","language":"en-US","access":{"audience":"custom-shared-preview","indexable":true},"provenance":{"sourceUrl":"https://www.mentalhealth.com/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy","wordpressId":"4996","contentCompleteness":"complete","dateScope":"original-source"},"authors":[{"@type":"Person","@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany#person","name":"Ondina Nandine Hatvany","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany"}],"dates":{"datePublished":"2012-02-17T05:00:00Z","dateModified":"2026-01-15T16:43:29Z"},"content":{"html":"<nav class=\"breadcrumbs\" aria-label=\"Breadcrumb\"><ol><li><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/\">Home</a></li><li><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library\">Library</a></li><li><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/therapy\">Therapy</a></li><li><span aria-current=\"page\">Making the Most of Couples Therapy</span></li></ol></nav><div class=\"article-page article-standard\" data-library-standard><div class=\"article-main-grid\"><header class=\"article-heading\"><h1>Making the Most of Couples Therapy</h1><p class=\"article-inline-credits\">Written by <a class=\"article-credit-person\" href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany\"><img src=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/wordpress/9245.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"22\" height=\"22\" loading=\"lazy\">Ondina Nandine Hatvany</a></p><div class=\"article-dates\"><span>Published on <time datetime=\"2012-02-17T05:00:00Z\">February 17, 2012</time></span><span aria-hidden=\"true\"> · </span><span>Updated on <time datetime=\"2026-01-15T16:43:29Z\">January 15, 2026</time></span></div></header><div class=\"article-jumpbar\"></div><div class=\"article-layout\"><div class=\"article-reading\"><article class=\"prose\" id=\"article-content\"><div class=\"article-intro\" data-source-field=\"hero\"><p>\nAttending couples therapy can give your relationship the tools to succeed. Here’s how to get the most out of each session. </p></div><figure class=\"article-feature\"><img src=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/library/editorial-10359.webp\" alt=\"A couple embraces outdoors beneath a cloudy sky.\" width=\"1200\" height=\"390\" loading=\"eager\" decoding=\"async\"></figure><section class=\"article-takeaways\" aria-labelledby=\"key-takeaways\"><h2 id=\"key-takeaways\">Key takeaways</h2><ul><li>Couples therapy helps partners understand recurring problems and develop more constructive ways to respond.</li><li>Honesty, shared goals, and attention to each partner’s own behavior can make sessions more productive.</li><li>Practicing communication, boundaries, and repair outside sessions supports lasting relationship change.</li></ul></section><span id=\"article-summary\" class=\"section-anchor-alias\" data-section-alias=\"summary\" aria-hidden=\"true\"></span><h2 id=\"summary\">Summary</h2><ul>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Couples therapy can help you locate the root of your relationship struggles and develop strategies to address them. </span></li>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Make sure you and your partner enter therapy open-mindedly with minimal expectations, eager to improve the relationship. </span></li>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Effective couples therapy can enhance your relationship while also encouraging individual growth. </span></li>\n</ul><p><span>Couples therapy can be invaluable for partners looking to overcome a rough patch. Knowing what to expect can help you make the most of the experience. Here are some couples therapy tips that might help. </span>\n</p><h2 id=\"understanding-couples-therapy\">Understanding Couples Therapy</h2><p><span>Couples therapy is a type of psychotherapy that works to uncover relationship problems at their source and develop solutions to resolve them. Having a professional in the room to mediate can help couples address issues calmly and respectfully. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"do-you-need-couples-therapy\">Do You Need Couples Therapy?</h3><p><span>According to family therapist Ondina Nandine Hatvany, it’s never too early for couples therapy <a href=\"#caring-mental-health\" class=\"article-citation\" aria-label=\"Reference 1\" data-reference-number=\"1\">[1]</a>. “Don’t wait until the relationship is dying and then ask your therapist to save it,” she says. If your relationship is characterized by frequent conflicts, intimacy struggles, or miscommunication, therapy might be able to help. </span>\n</p><h2 id=\"couples-therapy-key-strategies\">Couples Therapy: Key Strategies</h2><p><span>Couples therapists employ a variety of techniques to help you and your partner reconnect. Common strategies include: </span>\n</p><ul>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Identifying feelings </span></li>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Addressing unresolved conflicts </span></li>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Correcting negative patterns </span></li>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Developing conflict resolution skills </span></li>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Collaborating to create solutions </span></li>\n    <li aria-level=\"1\"><span>Finding effective communication strategies </span></li>\n</ul><h3 id=\"setting-goals-and-building-a-shared-vision\">Setting Goals and Building a Shared Vision</h3><p><span>“The truth is that the best outcomes are reached in couples counseling when you have more goals for yourself than for your partner,” Hatvany says. When one partner is willing to change, the other is more likely to do the same. With good communication, you can blend your individual goals into a shared vision for your lives. </span>\n</p><h2 id=\"preparing-for-therapy\">Preparing for Therapy</h2><p><span>Before entering therapy, make sure you and your partner are both eager to discuss the relationship honestly and intend to improve it. Consider reflecting on your behavior to identify how you contribute to the relationship, either positively or negatively. </span>\n<span>Managing your expectations is just as important. According to Hatvany, “The hardest part of couples therapy comes when they realize that they cannot make their partners change.” Try to enter couples therapy with an open mind. You both must be willing to work together and find solutions as a team. </span>\n</p><h2 id=\"addressing-relationship-challenges\">Addressing Relationship Challenges</h2><p><span>Knowing which issues you want to cover can make your therapy sessions more productive. Here are some challenges couples commonly address. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"ending-the-cycle\">Ending the Cycle</h3><p><span>When a couple addresses conflict by blaming each other, it can produce a vicious cycle of defensive and retaliatory behavior. A couples therapist can help you break this system, often in the form of “I” statements or mirroring exercises. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"breaking-individual-barriers\">Breaking Individual Barriers</h3><p><span>When you’re prompted to evaluate your feelings and behaviors, it can be easier to identify patterns you’d like to improve on. Guided by therapy, you may recognize some personal blocks that have prevented you from being the kind of partner you want to be. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"rebuilding-trust-after-betrayal\">Rebuilding Trust After Betrayal</h3><p><span>Healing from past pain can be more effective within a safe space. Validation exercises and prediction method techniques can help you reduce negative assumptions and understand your partner to build deeper trust. </span>\n</p><h2 id=\"enhancing-relationship-dynamics\">Enhancing Relationship Dynamics</h2><p><span>For partners in couples therapy, tips for enhancing specific aspects of your relationship are a significant benefit. Here are some potential areas of improvement. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"maintaining-intimacy-and-sexual-health\">Maintaining Intimacy and Sexual Health</h3><p><span>Counseling can help you rediscover intimacy in your relationship. This can mean putting past conflicts to rest or employing reminiscing exercises to evoke buried passions. Some therapists may give you “homework” to complete in the privacy of your home and then reflect upon it. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"digital-influence-and-external-stressors\">Digital Influence and External Stressors</h3><p><span>External stressors—like job changes, extended family or excessive technology use—can strain a relationship. Couples therapy can provide you with ways to stay connected in situations you can’t change and actionable solutions in situations you can. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"financial-harmony-and-parenting\">Financial Harmony and Parenting</h3><p><span>Financial dilemmas and new additions to the family can change your relationship’s dynamics. Professional guidance may make adapting to these changes easier, helping you find harmony as you exchange old habits for new ones. </span>\n</p><h2 id=\"personal-growth-and-relationship-health\">Personal Growth and Relationship Health</h2><p><span>A healthy partnership starts by building a positive relationship with yourself. Counseling can help you reflect on yourself as an individual, not just as one-half of a couple. With positive personal growth, your self-awareness is more likely to improve, making you a better partner. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"self-care-and-boundaries\">Self-Care and Boundaries</h3><p><span>“Becoming a more effective partner is the best way to improve a relationship,” says Hatvany. Caring for yourself can reduce stress, increase energy, and make you physically healthier—all of which can make it easier to show up for your partner <a href=\"#caring-mental-health\" class=\"article-citation\" aria-label=\"Reference 1\" data-reference-number=\"1\">[1]</a>. Setting boundaries is one way of practicing self-care, and counseling can teach you how to do it. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"mindfulness-and-individuality\">Mindfulness and Individuality</h3><p><span>Being mindful of each other’s individuality may help you better understand your partner’s behavior. Accepting that you can’t change your partner is useful in reducing friction and avoiding the cycle of shaming and blaming. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"embracing-cultural-differences-and-shared-values\">Embracing Cultural Differences and Shared Values</h3><p><span>For cross-cultural couples, counseling offers a way to embrace cultural differences. This often means identifying the role culture plays in each other’s emotions and communication styles. Establishing shared values and goals may help bridge this gap to further strengthen the relationship. </span>\n</p><h2 id=\"long-term-success-in-relationships\">Long-Term Success in Relationships</h2><p><span>Long-term couples may grow weary of maintaining their relationship. The following couples therapy tips are just some of the ways counseling can ease the strain. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"building-long-distance-trust\">Building Long-Distance Trust</h3><p><span>Long-distance relationships face unique challenges, including time constraints and lack of physical intimacy. Without intervention, these can reduce trust between partners. A professional with experience assisting long-distance couples may be able to facilitate trust-building exercises and improve your sense of security within the relationship. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"the-art-of-apology-and-forgiveness\">The Art of Apology and Forgiveness</h3><p><span>It’s a myth that to forgive means to let an issue go. Rather, it symbolizes a couple’s commitment to overcoming challenges together. Counselors can guide a couple through the process of apologizing and forgiving, laying the foundation for further healing. </span>\n</p><h3 id=\"leveraging-support-systems\">Leveraging Support Systems</h3><p><span>Counselors can often provide couples with methods of finding external support. With multiple support channels, you and your partner may not feel as pressured to provide each other with emotional reassurance. This can promote individuality, reducing the relationship’s mental burden. </span>\n</p><h2 id=\"committing-to-couples-therapy\">Committing to Couples Therapy</h2><p><span>Couples therapy works best when each partner is fully dedicated and committed to the relationship’s success. While counseling may require emotional exertion and deep personal reflection, open and honest participation can have incredible results. Take the first step today, and you might find lasting improvement. </span>\n</p></article><div class=\"article-endmatter\"><section class=\"article-sources\" id=\"references\" data-source-references=\"\" data-reference-list=\"\" data-reference-style=\"author-date-numbered\"><h2 id=\"references-2\">References</h2><ol>\n    <li id=\"caring-mental-health\" data-reference-number=\"1\" data-bibliographic-metadata=\"verified\">National Institute of Mental Health. (2026). <em>Caring for Your Mental Health</em>. <a href=\"https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/caring-for-your-mental-health\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">Source</a></li>\n</ol></section><section class=\"article-about article-panel\"><h2 id=\"about-mentalhealth-com\">About MentalHealth.com</h2><p>MentalHealth.com helps people understand themselves, build healthier relationships, and access the right care. We bring together mental health education, diagnostics, and care management to support well-being throughout every phase of life.</p><div class=\"article-contributors\"><section class=\"article-bio\"><img src=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/wordpress/9245.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" loading=\"lazy\"><div><p class=\"article-bio-role\">Author</p><h3 id=\"ondina-nandine-hatvany\"><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany\">Ondina Nandine Hatvany</a></h3><p class=\"article-bio-credentials\">MFT</p><p>Ondina Nandine Hatvany is a licensed psychotherapist with practices in both Mill Valley and the Castro, San Francisco. Her specialty is queer, alternative, and traditional relationships.</p><dl><div><dt>Published</dt><dd><time datetime=\"2012-02-17T05:00:00Z\">February 17, 2012</time></dd></div><div><dt>Updated</dt><dd><time datetime=\"2026-01-15T16:43:29Z\">January 15, 2026</time></dd></div></dl></div></section></div></section><section class=\"article-medical article-panel article-pending\" role=\"note\" aria-label=\"Pending medical review\"><h2 id=\"medical-review-status\">Pending Medical Review</h2><p>We take mental health content seriously and follow industry-leading guidelines to ensure our users access the highest quality information. All editorial decisions for published content are made by the MentalHealth.com Editorial Team, with guidance from our Clinical Affairs Team.</p><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/publishing/editorial-policy\">Our medical review process</a></section><section class=\"article-expert article-expert-mobile\" aria-label=\"Subject matter expert\" data-expert-kind=\"related\"><p class=\"article-bio-role\">Subject matter expert</p><div class=\"article-expert-identity\"><img src=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/wordpress/13152.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" loading=\"lazy\"><h2><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel\">Carlos Protzel <span class=\"expert-credentials\">Psy.D.</span></a></h2></div><p class=\"article-expert-focus\">Evidence-based and humanistic therapies</p><a class=\"profile-experience-link experience-button\" href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel\">View experience</a></section><section class=\"article-topic-community article-topic-community-mobile\" aria-label=\"Related communities\"><img class=\"topic-community-banner\" src=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/library/editorial-10366.webp\" alt=\"\" width=\"48\" height=\"48\" loading=\"lazy\"><p class=\"topic-community-label\">Related communities</p><h2>Marriage</h2><p>A space for perspectives on partnership, communication, and the changing experiences of married life.</p><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/community/marriage\">Explore community</a></section></div></div><aside class=\"article-sidebar\" tabindex=\"0\" data-bounded-rail=\"\" aria-label=\"Article navigation and related information\"><details class=\"article-contents\" open data-section-preview=\"3\" data-expanded=\"false\" data-scrolled-past=\"false\"><summary><strong>Table of contents</strong><span aria-hidden=\"true\"></span><small data-current-section=\"\">Choose a section</small></summary><nav aria-label=\"Article contents\"><ol id=\"article-section-list\"><li><a href=\"#summary\" title=\"Summary\" aria-label=\"Summary\">Summary</a></li><li><a href=\"#understanding-couples-therapy\" title=\"Understanding Couples Therapy\" aria-label=\"Understanding Couples Therapy\">Understanding Couples Therapy</a></li><li><a href=\"#couples-therapy-key-strategies\" title=\"Couples Therapy: Key Strategies\" aria-label=\"Couples Therapy: Key Strategies\">Couples Therapy: Key Strategies</a></li><li><a href=\"#preparing-for-therapy\" title=\"Preparing for Therapy\" aria-label=\"Preparing for Therapy\">Preparing for Therapy</a></li><li><a href=\"#addressing-relationship-challenges\" title=\"Addressing Relationship Challenges\" aria-label=\"Addressing Relationship Challenges\">Addressing Relationship Challenges</a></li><li><a href=\"#enhancing-relationship-dynamics\" title=\"Enhancing Relationship Dynamics\" aria-label=\"Enhancing Relationship Dynamics\">Enhancing Relationship Dynamics</a></li><li><a href=\"#personal-growth-and-relationship-health\" title=\"Personal Growth and Relationship Health\" aria-label=\"Personal Growth and Relationship Health\">Personal Growth and Relationship Health</a></li><li><a href=\"#long-term-success-in-relationships\" title=\"Long-Term Success in Relationships\" aria-label=\"Long-Term Success in Relationships\">Long-Term Success in Relationships</a></li><li><a href=\"#committing-to-couples-therapy\" title=\"Committing to Couples Therapy\" aria-label=\"Committing to Couples Therapy\">Committing to Couples Therapy</a></li></ol><button type=\"button\" class=\"article-sections-toggle\" data-sections-toggle aria-controls=\"article-section-list\" aria-expanded=\"false\">View more</button></nav></details><section class=\"article-expert\" aria-label=\"Subject matter expert\" data-expert-kind=\"related\"><p class=\"article-bio-role\">Subject matter expert</p><div class=\"article-expert-identity\"><img src=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/wordpress/13152.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" loading=\"lazy\"><h2><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel\">Carlos Protzel <span class=\"expert-credentials\">Psy.D.</span></a></h2></div><p class=\"article-expert-focus\">Evidence-based and humanistic therapies</p><a class=\"profile-experience-link experience-button\" href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel\">View experience</a></section><section class=\"article-topic-community\" aria-label=\"Related communities\"><img class=\"topic-community-banner\" src=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/library/editorial-10366.webp\" alt=\"\" width=\"48\" height=\"48\" loading=\"lazy\"><p class=\"topic-community-label\">Related communities</p><h2>Marriage</h2><p>A space for perspectives on partnership, communication, and the changing experiences of married life.</p><a href=\"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/community/marriage\">Explore community</a></section></aside></div></div></div>","text":"HomeLibraryTherapyMaking the Most of Couples TherapyMaking the Most of Couples TherapyWritten by Ondina Nandine HatvanyPublished on February 17, 2012 · Updated on January 15, 2026 Attending couples therapy can give your relationship the tools to succeed. Here’s how to get the most out of each session. Key takeawaysCouples therapy helps partners understand recurring problems and develop more constructive ways to respond.Honesty, shared goals, and attention to each partner’s own behavior can make sessions more productive.Practicing communication, boundaries, and repair outside sessions supports lasting relationship change.Summary Couples therapy can help you locate the root of your relationship struggles and develop strategies to address them. Make sure you and your partner enter therapy open-mindedly with minimal expectations, eager to improve the relationship. Effective couples therapy can enhance your relationship while also encouraging individual growth. Couples therapy can be invaluable for partners looking to overcome a rough patch. Knowing what to expect can help you make the most of the experience. Here are some couples therapy tips that might help. Understanding Couples TherapyCouples therapy is a type of psychotherapy that works to uncover relationship problems at their source and develop solutions to resolve them. Having a professional in the room to mediate can help couples address issues calmly and respectfully. Do You Need Couples Therapy?According to family therapist Ondina Nandine Hatvany, it’s never too early for couples therapy [1]. “Don’t wait until the relationship is dying and then ask your therapist to save it,” she says. If your relationship is characterized by frequent conflicts, intimacy struggles, or miscommunication, therapy might be able to help. Couples Therapy: Key StrategiesCouples therapists employ a variety of techniques to help you and your partner reconnect. Common strategies include: Identifying feelings Addressing unresolved conflicts Correcting negative patterns Developing conflict resolution skills Collaborating to create solutions Finding effective communication strategies Setting Goals and Building a Shared Vision“The truth is that the best outcomes are reached in couples counseling when you have more goals for yourself than for your partner,” Hatvany says. When one partner is willing to change, the other is more likely to do the same. With good communication, you can blend your individual goals into a shared vision for your lives. Preparing for TherapyBefore entering therapy, make sure you and your partner are both eager to discuss the relationship honestly and intend to improve it. Consider reflecting on your behavior to identify how you contribute to the relationship, either positively or negatively. Managing your expectations is just as important. According to Hatvany, “The hardest part of couples therapy comes when they realize that they cannot make their partners change.” Try to enter couples therapy with an open mind. You both must be willing to work together and find solutions as a team. Addressing Relationship ChallengesKnowing which issues you want to cover can make your therapy sessions more productive. Here are some challenges couples commonly address. Ending the CycleWhen a couple addresses conflict by blaming each other, it can produce a vicious cycle of defensive and retaliatory behavior. A couples therapist can help you break this system, often in the form of “I” statements or mirroring exercises. Breaking Individual BarriersWhen you’re prompted to evaluate your feelings and behaviors, it can be easier to identify patterns you’d like to improve on. Guided by therapy, you may recognize some personal blocks that have prevented you from being the kind of partner you want to be. Rebuilding Trust After BetrayalHealing from past pain can be more effective within a safe space. Validation exercises and prediction method techniques can help you reduce negative assumptions and understand your partner to build deeper trust. Enhancing Relationship DynamicsFor partners in couples therapy, tips for enhancing specific aspects of your relationship are a significant benefit. Here are some potential areas of improvement. Maintaining Intimacy and Sexual HealthCounseling can help you rediscover intimacy in your relationship. This can mean putting past conflicts to rest or employing reminiscing exercises to evoke buried passions. Some therapists may give you “homework” to complete in the privacy of your home and then reflect upon it. Digital Influence and External StressorsExternal stressors—like job changes, extended family or excessive technology use—can strain a relationship. Couples therapy can provide you with ways to stay connected in situations you can’t change and actionable solutions in situations you can. Financial Harmony and ParentingFinancial dilemmas and new additions to the family can change your relationship’s dynamics. Professional guidance may make adapting to these changes easier, helping you find harmony as you exchange old habits for new ones. Personal Growth and Relationship HealthA healthy partnership starts by building a positive relationship with yourself. Counseling can help you reflect on yourself as an individual, not just as one-half of a couple. With positive personal growth, your self-awareness is more likely to improve, making you a better partner. Self-Care and Boundaries“Becoming a more effective partner is the best way to improve a relationship,” says Hatvany. Caring for yourself can reduce stress, increase energy, and make you physically healthier—all of which can make it easier to show up for your partner [1]. Setting boundaries is one way of practicing self-care, and counseling can teach you how to do it. Mindfulness and IndividualityBeing mindful of each other’s individuality may help you better understand your partner’s behavior. Accepting that you can’t change your partner is useful in reducing friction and avoiding the cycle of shaming and blaming. Embracing Cultural Differences and Shared ValuesFor cross-cultural couples, counseling offers a way to embrace cultural differences. This often means identifying the role culture plays in each other’s emotions and communication styles. Establishing shared values and goals may help bridge this gap to further strengthen the relationship. Long-Term Success in RelationshipsLong-term couples may grow weary of maintaining their relationship. The following couples therapy tips are just some of the ways counseling can ease the strain. Building Long-Distance TrustLong-distance relationships face unique challenges, including time constraints and lack of physical intimacy. Without intervention, these can reduce trust between partners. A professional with experience assisting long-distance couples may be able to facilitate trust-building exercises and improve your sense of security within the relationship. The Art of Apology and ForgivenessIt’s a myth that to forgive means to let an issue go. Rather, it symbolizes a couple’s commitment to overcoming challenges together. Counselors can guide a couple through the process of apologizing and forgiving, laying the foundation for further healing. Leveraging Support SystemsCounselors can often provide couples with methods of finding external support. With multiple support channels, you and your partner may not feel as pressured to provide each other with emotional reassurance. This can promote individuality, reducing the relationship’s mental burden. Committing to Couples TherapyCouples therapy works best when each partner is fully dedicated and committed to the relationship’s success. While counseling may require emotional exertion and deep personal reflection, open and honest participation can have incredible results. Take the first step today, and you might find lasting improvement. References National Institute of Mental Health. (2026). Caring for Your Mental Health. Source About MentalHealth.comMentalHealth.com helps people understand themselves, build healthier relationships, and access the right care. We bring together mental health education, diagnostics, and care management to support well-being throughout every phase of life.AuthorOndina Nandine HatvanyMFTOndina Nandine Hatvany is a licensed psychotherapist with practices in both Mill Valley and the Castro, San Francisco. Her specialty is queer, alternative, and traditional relationships.PublishedFebruary 17, 2012UpdatedJanuary 15, 2026Pending Medical ReviewWe take mental health content seriously and follow industry-leading guidelines to ensure our users access the highest quality information. All editorial decisions for published content are made by the MentalHealth.com Editorial Team, with guidance from our Clinical Affairs Team.Our medical review processSubject matter expertCarlos Protzel Psy.D.Evidence-based and humanistic therapiesView experienceRelated communitiesMarriageA space for perspectives on partnership, communication, and the changing experiences of married life.Explore communityTable of contentsChoose a sectionSummaryUnderstanding Couples TherapyCouples Therapy: Key StrategiesPreparing for TherapyAddressing Relationship ChallengesEnhancing Relationship DynamicsPersonal Growth and Relationship HealthLong-Term Success in RelationshipsCommitting to Couples TherapyView moreSubject matter expertCarlos Protzel Psy.D.Evidence-based and humanistic therapiesView experienceRelated communitiesMarriageA space for perspectives on partnership, communication, and the changing experiences of married life.Explore community","wordCount":1340},"schema":{"@context":"https://schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/#organization","name":"MentalHealth.com","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/"},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/#website","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/","name":"MentalHealth.com","inLanguage":"en-US","publisher":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/#organization"}},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Library","item":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"name":"Therapy","item":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/therapy"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":4,"name":"Making the Most of Couples Therapy","item":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy"}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#primaryimage","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/library/editorial-10359.webp","contentUrl":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/library/editorial-10359.webp","width":1200,"height":390,"encodingFormat":"image/webp","caption":"A couple embraces outdoors beneath a cloudy sky."},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany#person","name":"Ondina Nandine Hatvany","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany","jobTitle":"MFT","image":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/wordpress/9245.jpeg"},{"@type":"Article","@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#article","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy","headline":"Making the Most of Couples Therapy","description":"Get the most out of couples therapy by attending with an open mind and minimal expectations.","wordCount":1150,"mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#webpage"},"publisher":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/#organization"},"articleSection":"Library","citation":[{"@type":"CreativeWork","name":"National Institute of Mental Health. (2026). Caring for Your Mental Health. Source","url":"https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/caring-for-your-mental-health"}],"inLanguage":"en-US","datePublished":"2012-02-17T05:00:00Z","dateModified":"2026-01-15T16:43:29Z","author":[{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany#person"}],"image":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#primaryimage"}},{"@type":"MedicalWebPage","@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#webpage","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy","name":"Making the Most of Couples Therapy","description":"Get the most out of couples therapy by attending with an open mind and minimal expectations.","inLanguage":"en-US","isPartOf":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/#website"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#breadcrumb"},"mainEntity":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#article"},"relatedLink":["https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/the-importance-of-the-relationship-in-counseling-and-psychotherapy","https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/the-4-stages-of-dating-relationships-tips-for-couples","https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/5-ways-to-stop-an-argument-in-less-than-a-minute","https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/marriage-family-therapy","https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/marital-therapy-concepts","https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel"],"publisher":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/#organization"},"medicalAudience":{"@type":"MedicalAudience","audienceType":"General public"},"datePublished":"2012-02-17T05:00:00Z","dateModified":"2026-01-15T16:43:29Z","primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#primaryimage"}}]},"representations":{"html":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy","json":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/data/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy.json","jsonLd":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/data/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy.ld.json"},"$schema":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/data/page.schema.json","images":[{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/wordpress/9245.jpeg","alt":"","width":22,"height":22},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/library/editorial-10359.webp","alt":"A couple embraces outdoors beneath a cloudy sky.","width":1200,"height":390},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/wordpress/13152.jpeg","alt":"","width":64,"height":64},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/library/editorial-10366.webp","alt":"","width":48,"height":48}],"sections":[{"id":"key-takeaways","title":"Key takeaways","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#key-takeaways"},{"id":"summary","title":"Summary","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#summary"},{"id":"understanding-couples-therapy","title":"Understanding Couples Therapy","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#understanding-couples-therapy"},{"id":"do-you-need-couples-therapy","title":"Do You Need Couples Therapy?","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#do-you-need-couples-therapy"},{"id":"couples-therapy-key-strategies","title":"Couples Therapy: Key Strategies","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#couples-therapy-key-strategies"},{"id":"setting-goals-and-building-a-shared-vision","title":"Setting Goals and Building a Shared Vision","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#setting-goals-and-building-a-shared-vision"},{"id":"preparing-for-therapy","title":"Preparing for Therapy","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#preparing-for-therapy"},{"id":"addressing-relationship-challenges","title":"Addressing Relationship Challenges","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#addressing-relationship-challenges"},{"id":"ending-the-cycle","title":"Ending the Cycle","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#ending-the-cycle"},{"id":"breaking-individual-barriers","title":"Breaking Individual Barriers","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#breaking-individual-barriers"},{"id":"rebuilding-trust-after-betrayal","title":"Rebuilding Trust After Betrayal","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#rebuilding-trust-after-betrayal"},{"id":"enhancing-relationship-dynamics","title":"Enhancing Relationship Dynamics","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#enhancing-relationship-dynamics"},{"id":"maintaining-intimacy-and-sexual-health","title":"Maintaining Intimacy and Sexual Health","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#maintaining-intimacy-and-sexual-health"},{"id":"digital-influence-and-external-stressors","title":"Digital Influence and External Stressors","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#digital-influence-and-external-stressors"},{"id":"financial-harmony-and-parenting","title":"Financial Harmony and Parenting","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#financial-harmony-and-parenting"},{"id":"personal-growth-and-relationship-health","title":"Personal Growth and Relationship Health","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#personal-growth-and-relationship-health"},{"id":"self-care-and-boundaries","title":"Self-Care and Boundaries","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#self-care-and-boundaries"},{"id":"mindfulness-and-individuality","title":"Mindfulness and Individuality","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#mindfulness-and-individuality"},{"id":"embracing-cultural-differences-and-shared-values","title":"Embracing Cultural Differences and Shared Values","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#embracing-cultural-differences-and-shared-values"},{"id":"long-term-success-in-relationships","title":"Long-Term Success in Relationships","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#long-term-success-in-relationships"},{"id":"building-long-distance-trust","title":"Building Long-Distance Trust","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#building-long-distance-trust"},{"id":"the-art-of-apology-and-forgiveness","title":"The Art of Apology and Forgiveness","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#the-art-of-apology-and-forgiveness"},{"id":"leveraging-support-systems","title":"Leveraging Support Systems","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#leveraging-support-systems"},{"id":"committing-to-couples-therapy","title":"Committing to Couples Therapy","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#committing-to-couples-therapy"},{"id":"references-2","title":"References","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#references-2"},{"id":"about-mentalhealth-com","title":"About MentalHealth.com","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#about-mentalhealth-com"},{"id":"ondina-nandine-hatvany","title":"Ondina Nandine Hatvany","level":3,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#ondina-nandine-hatvany"},{"id":"medical-review-status","title":"Pending Medical Review","level":2,"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#medical-review-status"}],"references":[{"number":1,"id":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#caring-mental-health","text":"National Institute of Mental Health. (2026). Caring for Your Mental Health. Source","links":[{"url":"https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/caring-for-your-mental-health","label":"Source"}],"url":"https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/caring-for-your-mental-health","metadataStatus":"verified"}],"relatedReading":[],"links":[{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/","label":"Home"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library","label":"Library"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/therapy","label":"Therapy"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany","label":"Ondina Nandine Hatvany"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#caring-mental-health","label":"[1]"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#caring-mental-health","label":"[1]"},{"url":"https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/caring-for-your-mental-health","label":"Source"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/ondina-hatvany","label":"Ondina Nandine Hatvany"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/publishing/editorial-policy","label":"Our medical review process"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel","label":"Carlos Protzel Psy.D."},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel","label":"View experience"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/community/marriage","label":"Explore community"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#summary","label":"Summary"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#understanding-couples-therapy","label":"Understanding Couples Therapy"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#couples-therapy-key-strategies","label":"Couples Therapy: Key Strategies"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#preparing-for-therapy","label":"Preparing for Therapy"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#addressing-relationship-challenges","label":"Addressing Relationship Challenges"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#enhancing-relationship-dynamics","label":"Enhancing Relationship Dynamics"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#personal-growth-and-relationship-health","label":"Personal Growth and Relationship Health"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#long-term-success-in-relationships","label":"Long-Term Success in Relationships"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy#committing-to-couples-therapy","label":"Committing to Couples Therapy"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel","label":"Carlos Protzel Psy.D."},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/people/carlos-protzel","label":"View experience"},{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/community/marriage","label":"Explore community"}],"seo":{"title":"Making the Most of Couples Therapy | MentalHealth.com","description":"Get the most out of couples therapy by attending with an open mind and minimal expectations.","canonical":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy","robots":"index,follow","socialImage":{"url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/assets/social-tiles-20261006-dots/library.png","width":1200,"height":630,"alt":"MentalHealth.com — Library","type":"image/png","sitemapGroup":"library"}},"breadcrumbs":[{"name":"Home","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/"},{"name":"Library","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library"},{"name":"Therapy","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/therapy"},{"name":"Making the Most of Couples Therapy","url":"https://mentalhealth-v2.workspace-454808.chatgpt.site/library/how-to-get-the-most-from-your-couples-therapy"}],"subjectMatterExpert":{"name":"Carlos Protzel, Psy.D.","url":"/people/carlos-protzel","profileId":"13151","topic":"therapy","focus":"Evidence-based and humanistic therapies","selectionBasis":"Documented expertise in the existing published profile","reviewAttribution":false},"keyTakeaways":["Couples therapy helps partners understand recurring problems and develop more constructive ways to respond.","Honesty, shared goals, and attention to each partner’s own behavior can make sessions more productive.","Practicing communication, boundaries, and repair outside sessions supports lasting relationship change."],"introduction":{"html":"\nAttending couples therapy can give your relationship the tools to succeed. Here’s how to get the most out of each session. ","text":"Attending couples therapy can give your relationship the tools to succeed. Here’s how to get the most out of each session.","sourceField":"hero"},"navigation":[{"label":"Summary","href":"#summary","heading":"Summary"},{"label":"Understanding Couples Therapy","href":"#understanding-couples-therapy","heading":"Understanding Couples Therapy"},{"label":"Couples Therapy: Key Strategies","href":"#couples-therapy-key-strategies","heading":"Couples Therapy: Key Strategies"},{"label":"Preparing for Therapy","href":"#preparing-for-therapy","heading":"Preparing for Therapy"},{"label":"Addressing Relationship Challenges","href":"#addressing-relationship-challenges","heading":"Addressing Relationship Challenges"},{"label":"Enhancing Relationship Dynamics","href":"#enhancing-relationship-dynamics","heading":"Enhancing Relationship Dynamics"},{"label":"Personal Growth and Relationship Health","href":"#personal-growth-and-relationship-health","heading":"Personal Growth and Relationship Health"},{"label":"Long-Term Success in Relationships","href":"#long-term-success-in-relationships","heading":"Long-Term Success in Relationships"},{"label":"Committing to Couples Therapy","href":"#committing-to-couples-therapy","heading":"Committing to Couples Therapy"}],"relatedCommunity":{"community":"/community/marriage","basis":"topic match"},"referencePresentation":"Numbered author–date bibliography with linked source documents; n.d. denotes unavailable publication date.","reviewer":null,"collections":[]}
